so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
