I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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