im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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