the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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