Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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