there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
