Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
