Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Randomize
