He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
