There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
