508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
