Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I wish you could order shots online.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
