I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
