Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Randomize
