Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I am naked and annoyed.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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