She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
