oh god the rape fog is back!
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
