oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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