I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
