We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
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