his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
