just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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