I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
