BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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