What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
