We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
