Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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