Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Randomize
