i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
