The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
