Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
