K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Randomize
