Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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