Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I understand Curling. That high.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
3pm strippers are depressing
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Randomize