Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
