Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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