Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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