ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
You were trust falling into bushes
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