one word: firstdatebathroomanal
No stitches, just platelets and will power
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
