Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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