The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
