Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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