and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
