i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
