I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
