that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
