I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
