Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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