yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
We have so much sex to catch up on
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
