Sry I called you an 8
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize