like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
